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Sign Up to Last. If you're looking for the 30 Rock Soundtrack, see Jeff Richmond. The Best of the Birthdays - 30 Rock. Liz Lemon Becomes a Villain - 30 Rock. Liz Lemon's Boyfriend Is 20! Liz and Danny Cosplay - 30 Rock. Kenneth Tongues Cerie - 30 Rock. Jenna "Yokos" a Band - 30 Rock. Jack Is a Daddy Bear - 30 Rock. Tracy Hides Money in Kenneth - 30 Rock.
Every Peacock Ever - 30 Rock. Tracy Jordan Goes to Space - 30 Rock. Liz vs. Jonathan - 30 Rock. Liz Lemon Hates St. Patrick's Day - 30 Rock. Tracy and Jenna Ruin St. Jack Donaghy's Best Negotiations - 30 Rock. Hazel Tries to Seduce Tracy - 30 Rock. Liz and Jack Agree to Divorce - 30 Rock. Liz Lemon's Flashbacks - 30 Rock. Jack's Gay Bomb - 30 Rock. Every Rachel Dratch Character - 30 Rock.
Kenneth's Valentine's Date - 30 Rock. The Best of Angie Jordan - 30 Rock. Liz Prank-Calls Jack - 30 Rock. Jack Donaghy's Porn for Women - 30 Rock. All the Oscar Winners and Nominees - 30 Rock. Pete Cheats on Paula With Shut It Down!
Jack Donaghy: The Bachelor. Kenneth Seduces Banks. Jack Is Reunited with Avery Jessup. The Musical Stylings of Jenna Maroney. New Queer's Eve. New Year's Resolutions: Expectations vs. Winter Madness at TGS. Liz Lemon Buys a Wedding Dress. Christmas Carols at 30 Rock.
- 30 Rock Season 1 trailers and clips at - Metacritic
Pin on Comedy: 30 Rock.Today You Are a Man | Episode Transcript | 30 Rock Quotes | 30Rock | 30 Rock
Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it! I've seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's! The sewer people stole my skateboard! The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time!
I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk! Frank while writing his biography According to wikipedia you were discovered after doing standup at the Apollo in Jack: Tracy, we think your spending has gotten out of control. Tracy: while wearing a shirt made of money Give me an example. Tracy I've put more money into this than my money pit in Connecticut. Jack You have a house in Connecticut?
Tracy No, I do not. Jenna Maroney. Played By: Jane Krakowski. Kenneth Parcell. Played By: Jack McBrayer. Mama, I am not a person. My body is just a flesh vessel for an immortal being whose name, if you heard it, would make you lose your mind. Kenneth: There are only two things I love in this world: Everybody, and television. Kenneth: defensively Who said I've been alive forever?
And I don't know how much longer I can do it". Pete Hornberger. Played By: Scott Adsit. Frank Rossitano. Cerie Xerox. Played By: Katrina Bowden. Cerie : I really don't. They just kinda stay up there on their own, see? James "Toofer" Spurlock. Played By: Keith Powell. Warren "Grizz" Griswold. Played By: Grizz Chapman. Walter "DotCom" Slattery.
Played By: Kevin Brown. Jack : DotCom, this need you have to be the smartest guy in the room is Played By: Maulik Pancholy. JD Lutz. Danny Baker. For there is only one place in the known universe where Liz and Criss might venture on this day to purchase such a piece of furniture.
And it is no ordinary place. It is a store so entrenched in the spirit of evil that it turns happy couples into bitter, cloying, contempt-filled enemies upon entry: IKEA. Seriously, IKEA takes one hell of a beating in this episode. But knowing full well the dangers of the store, Liz brings Criss along, convinced that they can overcome the curse. How wrong she is. They are doomed from the start. The controlling, argumentative malcontent that Liz is takes issue with everything that Criss says and does inside the store.
And Criss, being a person, gets frustrated by this. By the time they reach the end of the forest maze that is IKEA, Liz and Criss are screaming at one another and part ways, leaving poor Elizabeth sobbing alone on a parking lot bench, until she is approached by…. We look like Far Side drawings. Tracy and Frank both have a leviathan of experience in this particular walk of life, so they let Lutz in on all their tricks, dragging him to every venue where desperate, unhappy women can be found and taken advantage of.
Lutz strikes out every time, offending the women in question or embarrassing himself. See, even they know about the IKEA curse, and they know that all women who leave the store are lonely, unhappy and vulnerable. And the loneliest, unhappiest and most vulnerable looking woman in the lot? A brunette sobbing alone on a park bench. Liz and Lutz both realize how pathetic they are, and they realize that they themselves are to blame for this.
And annoying. People are really like that. They might come to realizations here and there about their own flaws, but a lot of times, they continue right on with those flaws. Well…who the hell knows? But it happens. Thank you, 30 Rock, for being honest. At least, for now. He does only have three months, lest you forget. Side note: Lutz realizes that he has spent the entire day with two friends supporting him and trying to make him happy. I hope I photograph okay, because when I look into a mirror, there's just a white haze.
Liz : Hey, nerds! Guess who has two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today. Liz: Word of advice: if the will says you have to spend the night in a haunted house, you better hope that everybody else there is black guys and sluts. Liz: Randy, this is James Franco, and James Franco: Randy. Kimiko's head bows Randy: disturbed I should probably go. Jack: What did he do to the back of your knees?
Liz: A lady never tells. Jack: Dot Com, this need of yours to always be the smartest person in the room is very off-putting. Tracy: Why is everyone asking me for advice? I'm Tracy Jordan, father of three, married 22 years, I run my own business! Tracy: It's all coming back to me. Oh my God! I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs!
I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a rib cage - a rib cage! Why did you bring me here? I blocked all this stuff out for a reason! Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish! The G Train! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it! I've seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's! The sewer people stole my skateboard!
The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor , generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time!
I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk! I've always wanted to say that, and I can't believe I wasted it on you. Jack: Tracy, what building is right next to Penn Station? I know because my friend goes there. His name is Tracy. Jack: : I don't know who told you to say that, Rossitano, but you have no Frank : Twig and Plums.
Jack: : I have to go to Pete: Oh my God. My cousin Carl crashed his car, and now he's in a coma at the Kendall Clinic. Milton: Without a kidney, I'm going to die. Kenneth: Miss Lemon, there's a reason God gave us two ears and only one mouth; listening is twice as important as talking.
He must really want us to poke things! Liz : God, Jack, why are you being such a wang about this? Jack : I'll take that as a compliment. An Wang, the founder of Wang computers, is one of the greatest businessmen of the twentieth century. Harry : You made us jump the shark! You're the reason we didn't have a tenth season! Markie : I had just bought my second home when they brought that idiot werewolf lawyer in! Jenna : insulted Uh, that "idiot werewolf" paid for my hand reduction surgery, okay?
Jack : The Italians have a saying, Lemon: "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Liz : Hey, there's a line. Man : Now, there's two lines. Liz: "Is it identical? Seven items are different. See if you can spot which ones. Liz: How are you not moved by this?
Jack: Because I'm listening to the words. Hazel: Then he undressed me with his eyes. And then he had his way with me Liz: [disapprovingly] Ugh. The male gaze. Hazel: Yeah, they're all a bunch of gays!
Jenna: [watching Liz walk away] I'd hit that. Tracy: [critically] Too small. Jack: That wasn't supposed to be a public hearing. Devon: Awwww, I guess somebody weaked it. Jack: You did! You weaked it!
Liz : Yep. Fun, craaaazy Claire. Jenna: Oh man! Do you remember that night we all danced in front of that open fire hydrant? Liz: Haha yeah. Her roof parties. Jenna: Karaoke and boys talk. Liz: The all night scavenger hunt. Jenna: Do you remember when we crashed that Polish wedding? Jenna: Oh, I know. She's going to make us buy more of her homemade jewelry. Birds always attack me when I wear it. This is how you treat me: like a white-whiskered gibbon put on this earth to do nothing but dance around for your amusement and reduce the insect population of Malaysia.
Liz: What made you think I was gay? Jack: Your shoes. Jack: Those shoes are definitely bi-curious. Elisa: I have a terrible secret. Please don't ask me what it is. Liz: I don't want to know what it is!
Really , Lemon? That's your guess? You want to see me naked? Liz: Kind of. Liz : I have a new life philosophy that I call Lizbeanism I'm Liz and obviously my philosophy is simple like a bean. Lizbeanism means that I am a dike Musical, very athletic, not very good swimmers. Again, I'm talking about the family. Charlie : This is Studio 6H. Do you know what's been shot on this stage? Jack : And the moon landing.
Jack: I'm sorry, what do you call yourself? Elisa: A Puerto Rican. Jack: No, I know you can say that but what do I call you? Elisa: A Puerto Rican! Jack: Wow, that does not sound right Tracy: plaintively I even called a basketball team a bunch of nappy-headed hoes, but apparently I'm allowed to do that?
Obsolete Mentor : Rosemary Howard. Liz: This is Nurse Jamakaiah from Dr. Kaplan's office. So here's da ting. You need to come in today so the doctor can check dem teeth, mon. Wesley: Oh, is there something wrong? My check-up isn't for another week. Liz: He tinks dat toot might have some bad mojo in it, ja see. Might you be available to come in around , me lad? Kenneth standing by : You're going Irish! Kenneth : I've worn this old jacket since nineteen- [incomprehensible mumble] and now they've just thrown it away.
Kenneth : No! I'm not done with him, Jacob! He stays on this side! Kenneth: [collapsing a telescope] You see how much good is in them? How much capacity for love? Give me more time, Jacob! Jack Welch: Please, John, call me Jack.
Jack Donaghy: I actually go by Jack as well. Jack Welch: I don't think so. To top if off, Kenneth gives a strained version of his usual squeal that sounds suspiciously like being strangulated. Jack : [smiling] Lemon. Liz : [also smiling] Jack. Jack : I was wrong. It's you, it's always been you. I want to do business with you, Lemon.
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